I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Randomize
