i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
We named our party play list daddy issues
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
