we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
