So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
