how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Randomize
