my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
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It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize