Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.