I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
