That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
