I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Randomize
