im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Randomize