I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
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