belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
We have so much sex to catch up on
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
