We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
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