Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize
