Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
