I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
