Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Randomize