Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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