Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize
