and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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