He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
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