told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
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