so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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