I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
