Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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