goodnight i made you a song goodbye
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
