i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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