"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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