i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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