I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
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