when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
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