I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
