Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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