the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
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