when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
