Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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