Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
He called his prostate his "boner button".
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
