Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize