The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
