Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
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Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
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PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
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