Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize