My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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