Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
honey bunches of taint.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Let the clothes fall where they may.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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