Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Can you bring me the toilet please
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Randomize