You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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