David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
