The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
