Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Randomize
