i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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