arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
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